Huntington Pen Pals - New Friends in United States

I was hoping this would be more like the fourth grade where Mr. Upchurch would say, "Dillon, your new penpal's name is Fiasilli. Be sure to write him every Friday or his parents will deem him unsuitable for social inclusion and literally ship him off to their local Leper Colony, still secretly housed on Malachi Island." Alas, like everything else, this is far more competitive than that. I'm now charged with being interesting enough to get someone to want to talk to me more than they want to talk to the people who've placed other ads. Moreover, I always feel so put out when it comes to question/answer periods. I much prefer to learn about people as things happen. That can be pretty tough online. However, this will not deter me from, at least, trying to find someone worth talking to.

I'm a (barely) 31-year-old Cancer with a burning desire to learn as much as I possibly can. I do this while exhibiting a rather dryly morbid sense of humor in order to shield myself from what I may learn along the way. We all need buffers. This one seems to work better than the cocaine and narcotic pain relievers that I used to keep on hand.

Speaking of the Judy Garland diet, I'm a big fan of the theater and old movies. While most people crave the idea of acting out like Bette Davis, I've all but demolished all sense of internal monologue so that I actually do it. While this certainly gets me in trouble, it also leads to a series of fun times to be had by all involved.

I'm looking for some brave, objective soul willing to share my take on the depravity that we call life. If you manage to laugh off the goings-on of a harsh existence, I'd love to hear from you. Until then, good luck out there. You're gonna need it.

How sassy... ...and a little sad,

Dillon